Kidding aside, I want you to choose a day that is NOT New Year’s to reflect and reestablish more of what you want in your relationship. Part 3 of the workbook “Connection Strategies for Every Relationship” should be provoking some thoughts and info on what is working and not working so well in your relationship. This is not a finding-the-bad-guy conversation – it is asking for what you need, removing some of what you don’t, it is compromise and an opportunity.
Listen, corporate America has it right in some ways and I take it to my sessions with clients and now to YOU! What strong, wise and progressive company doesn’t use an annual review to keep their bottom line top of mind and to keep all the moving parts moving in the right direction?
Use the thinking points and conversation starters below to develop a habit of having a year in review in your relationship. If you rrrrrreally want to make me happy, add a ritual of a monthly check – in and a weekly check-in. Heck, an authentic, present, daily “How are you really doing, babe?” goes a long way.
Here are some relationship review thinking points and conversation starters:
- A memory from the last year that highlights our relationship strength is:
- In that experience you were: (use A.R.R.E. You There for Me? language- see workbook!)
- I felt T.A.B.S. were enhanced by you when:
- I would like more of ________ because it provides me (use A.R.R.E. You There for Me? language.) and builds these T.A.B.S. ____________.
- It would help me lean into you and our relationship more if we could reduce/remove/renegotiate _________________ because it hinders T.A.B.S. in this way:
- I look forward to the coming year because:
- I am grateful for:
- I plan to enhance our relationship by:
- I commit to:
- I welcome feedback about: